Low self image

Leselberry · 30-Jun-04, 01:04 AM

Due to a few self-destructive relationships years ago, I have gained a somewhat low self image as a result. Although I've since married a great guy who says all the right things (well, most of the time) and I've been working out for 6 years, sometimes those ugly comments come back to haunt me. I try to remind myself that I'm in the best shape of my life and those last 10 are going to come off sooner or later, but whenever I do something unhealthy like eat a bunch of chips or have a few drinks or smoke a cigarette or two, I really beat myself up about it. Even though I don't do it very often. Does anybody else go through this sort of thing every now and then?

**Jaster** · 30-Jun-04, 06:50 AM

I am glad to hear you are on the right track here.
I have a few friends that sound like you. I always tease them into feeling better about themselves. For instance when the call on the phone it may go like this.
"Hey it's just me" and I say "Never say JUST me, Be proud of the Me you are. Be the best you you can be!" stuff like that. They tease me back telling me I have too much pride in myself but I don't think so.
Never feel bad about one slip up If I did that I would get nowhere.
If someone tells me "You'll never be able to do that!" I don't look at the negative. Instead I remember it and think to myself "I'll show them!" And in the end I do!

rrouleau · 30-Jun-04, 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leselberry

Due to a few self-destructive relationships years ago, I have gained a somewhat low self image as a result. Although I've since married a great guy who says all the right things (well, most of the time) and I've been working out for 6 years, sometimes those ugly comments come back to haunt me. I try to remind myself that I'm in the best shape of my life and those last 10 are going to come off sooner or later, but whenever I do something unhealthy like eat a bunch of chips or have a few drinks or smoke a cigarette or two, I really beat myself up about it. Even though I don't do it very often. Does anybody else go through this sort of thing every now and then?

Theres no need to beat yourself up about that. Hey you gotta live and eating junk food once in awhile is not gonna kill yeah. Have some fun and mix it up once in awhile. i used to get all mad the next day after i ate all kinds of junk food. But gotta live a lil so......

**Lady C** · 30-Jun-04, 08:12 AM

I would consider yourself normal and human. Just don't let it become a habit. Jaster is right, always look for the positive and not the negative.

SurfinAmy · 30-Jun-04, 10:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leselberry

sometimes those ugly comments come back to haunt me.

For a long time I worked at a battered women's shelter. These were some of the strongest, most determined and courageous women I have ever met. They were also the most down on themselves, anxiety ridden, and fearful. The courage they showed in facing those fears and overcoming some HUGE obstacles truly impressed me. Whoever said sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me obviously didn't know what they were talking about.
Keep looking forward and up!!!!!

:
-Amy

Rainheart · 30-Jun-04, 11:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leselberry

Due to a few self-destructive relationships years ago, I have gained a somewhat low self image as a result. Although I've since married a great guy who says all the right things (well, most of the time) and I've been working out for 6 years, sometimes those ugly comments come back to haunt me. I try to remind myself that I'm in the best shape of my life and those last 10 are going to come off sooner or later, but whenever I do something unhealthy like eat a bunch of chips or have a few drinks or smoke a cigarette or two, I really beat myself up about it. Even though I don't do it very often. Does anybody else go through this sort of thing every now and then?

When these thoughts come to haunt you, try to just notice them as an observer like you are watching someone else. Notice the feelings you get from thinking those thoughts. You can say to yourself I used to feel like this a lot in the past but now wow I hardly ever feel that any more, i'm so glad I am doing things now that help me feel better about myself and others. I think we all have weak moments or just want to induldge in something we know isn't the best choice but we don't do those things as often anymore, forgive yourself and move on to the rest of your day.

arbit · 30-Jun-04, 04:07 PM

Being healthy is more than just being in great shape physically. Beating yourself mentally is also unhealthy. Either you never eat unhealthy food, or if you do once in a while, just accept it, dont beat yourself. There is no need for punishment. People who live long lives are not paranoid about their habits
Yeah I know its easier said than done!

SindyLou · 06-Jul-04, 09:05 AM

Low self esteem is a very hard one to overcome. Sometimes we don't appreciate what we have. Often we don't. Count your blessings. Being alive is a blessing. I felt exactly like you did. Beating myself up all the time for every backslide on my habits and goals. What cured me? I had a cancer scare. I thought I was going to die. Now, once or twice a day, when I am sinking into any kind of funk, I stop and think how lucky I am to have this beautiful day. I have been the happiest in my life since I thought my life was ending. Think about dieing...... and appreciate living.

Andrea · 06-Jul-04, 09:27 AM

Even the most beautiful girls, have the lowest self esteem, believe it or not. You have to forget about the past and all the ugly comments, no matter how hard it may be, in order to feel good about yourself again. Look forward to your future and don't let anything or anyone stand in your way!!!

**midgetcop** · 06-Jul-04, 02:57 PM

Yeah...it seems that most women have severe self-esteem issues when it comes to their physical self. I suffer from it too....I beat myself up if I indulge once in a while in food or drink. I'm terribly insecure over my body-shape....despite the fact that I can lift heavier weights than most women in my gym.

There's a lot of pressure to fit a certain physical ideal when you're a woman....Heck, I guess there's that pressure for men as well.

But hey....I try to cheer myself up by telling myself that I'm not going by anyone's standards but my own. To me, it's not about appearance, it's about OUTPUT. It's about strength. It's about enjoyment. It's about pride. Screw the majority and their misconceptions on female bodies!!!!!

Now if only I could totally believe that.........

SindyLou · 13-Jul-04, 01:51 PM

I think depression and low feelings are also hormonal for women. A few days a month everything gets to me. Much of the month the same info is water off a ducks back. Be easy on yourself during the low times, and don't make any major life altering decisions during that time, have patience with yourself. Get back on track, writing in your journal, setting goals and working daily towards your ideal self. Take action and you will feel good about doing your best.

**midgetcop** · 14-Jul-04, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SindyLou

I think depression and low feelings are also hormonal for women. A few days a month everything gets to me. Much of the month the same info is water off a ducks back. Be easy on yourself during the low times, and don't make any major life altering decisions during that time, have patience with yourself. Get back on track, writing in your journal, setting goals and working daily towards your ideal self. Take action and you will feel good about doing your best.

Hehe. I agree. There are certain days during the month that I am absolutely miserable.

Damn those hormones!!

trHawT · 16-Jul-04, 06:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Andrea

Even the most beautiful girls, have the lowest self esteem, believe it or not. You have to forget about the past and all the ugly comments, no matter how hard it may be, in order to feel good about yourself again. Look forward to your future and don't let anything or anyone stand in your way!!!

If the above is true, you must have a VERY low self-esteem! "
Even the most beautiful girls, have the lowest self esteem, believe it or not."

Andrea · 16-Jul-04, 09:50 AM

No where in my post did I say I had low self esteem. Even if I did, that's none of your business. This thread isn't about me. It's about Leselberry.

ajarvis · 16-Jul-04, 10:18 AM

I thought that sounded like a compliment! Saying you are beautiful.