Jack wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the night table. And, next to them,a single red rose!
Jack sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and
pressed. Jack looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect
order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the
aspirins, and cringes when he sees his huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror, and notices a note on the table:
"Honey ~ breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping - Love you!"
He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table eating. Jack asks, "Son, what happened last night?"
"Well, you came home at 3 am drunk and out of your mind. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."
Jack asks "So why is everything in such perfect order and so clean, I
have a rose and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "OH THAT .. Mom dragged you to the bedroom and when she tried to take off your pants, you screamed 'Leave me alone lady - I'M MARRIED.'"
-broken furniture $85.26
-hot breakfast $4.20
-Red rose bud $3.00
-two aspirin $.38
-saying the right thing to your wife when plastered ~ priceless